This whole week is a very sleepy week. Is it because age is catching up or is it because my baby is catching up in my tummy?
I slept only about 3 hours on Sunday. Monday morning was a rush, with sending DH off, sending X to school and sending W to tuition. I got a short cat nap before noon, but it was not enough. Tuesday's plan to go grocery shopping was foiled when it rained in the morning and I went back to sleep till noon!
I couldn't catch up on my sleep on Wednesday as the cleaning lady was buzzing around my house. And when I tried to sleep at night, dear baby was kicking and playing happily with daddy till the wee hours of the day. It doesn't help that she woke up as early as me this morning when I tried to open my heavy lids in the heavy morning rain. She sure is a very active girl, needing as little sleep as possible in mommy's tummy. But then again, she usually sleeps in the afternoon when mommy is moving about.
So, today's plan to go shopping for some last minute stuff was foiled again when I fell asleep till late morning. I managed to complete half of my shopping list with most of the other half left untouched.
Seems like the endless naps that I have taken could not make up for the lack of sleep on Sunday. What should I do? Catch up on my sleep over the weekend.
Hmm, looking forward to Saturday....
Bliss
Bliss
Thursday, September 30, 2010
Thursday, September 16, 2010
Confession of a Guilty Conscience
I love my dear husband (DH) very much. However, sometimes I cannot stop myself from hurting him. As it is, I am a very private and introvert person. I do not mind helping and be friendly with people, but I am a hermit when anything or any issue touches my personal things or space.
Last Friday, I have a house guest who is supposed to stay at our home for a month. I was already having nightmare even before she bought her air ticket. A check in the internet asked me to treat her like how I treat other house guest, but how do I do it when she is unpredictable? Upon arrival, her announcement of her intention to stay for a year almost gave me a heart attack!
Being a bad host, I was already feeling apprehensive after one night having her in our house. She is staying in the room where DH put his clothes. After one night, she took all of DH's empty clothes hangers and claimed them as her own. Who is to be blamed except for myself who fell behind in my ironing. She also took all my photo frames and dumped them out of the room and removing my plant, replacing it with her own things. So I took my stand the next morning by moving the plant back to its original place and put my photos in the store room.
As my guest tried to make herself comfortable and claimed the house as her own, I tried not to voice my discomfort to DH. Especially when this week is his busy week and most of all, she is his first love. Like it or not, one thing both of us have in common is we love him and he loves us. And the similarity ends there. Maybe the conflict or rather discomfort between myself and my house guest stem from our common trait.
Unfortunately all my restraint came to a halt when I told her to go stay at her daughter's house. She thought I tried to chase her away, of course I am, but I did not lie when I told her that her daughter invited her to stay. I do not know why she preferred to stay with us than her daughter even though our relationship is nothing to talk about. Anyway she told DH about it, hoping to expose my lie. I am blessed that her daughter called today to extend her invitation again. However, she agreed to stay there only for a few days, as she wants to come back and reclaim my home, haha.
I am ashamed to say that I failed not to involve DH in my vendetta. When his first love put her things into my needlework box, I immediately told her not to put her things in my house as I do not have enough storage space and I need to move around frequently. As I am always the only one who are packing our things, I could not afford to let her keep her things at my home. Furthermore, her daughter has bought a house and reserve a room for her. THAT should be her house.
On top of that I asked her to keep the scissors that she took from my kitchen. It being a kitchen scissors are rendered unsuitable to be used in the kitchen again after she took it to cut her things which are not of food items. I told her I would just buy a new scissors for my kitchen.
Maybe the communications that I had with her offended her that she decided not to come home the next day until DH is home. I do not know if she did it on purpose to spite me but she claimed that she forgot to bring the door access card and her mobile phone. As DH needed to work till midnight, she stayed out till he was home. It made me so worried that I have no other choice but to send a message to DH at his office and tell him about our fallout.
When DH brought her home at midnight, I just stayed in the room for not wanting to see her. At the same time, I was really, really ashamed to face DH for putting him in a difficult position again, even though she will only be visiting for a month. There and then, I decided not to communicate with her again. I think non-communication is better than miscommunication.
Now that she has gone to her daughter's house for a few days, I have time to think through what has been going on for the past few days. Maybe it is just me and my personality that is preventing me from having a good relationship with her. As of today, I am a very happy and contented person, except for this area of my life.
Guess I have to psycho myself to accept my fate and accept her into my life, as tough as it is. I should accept the fact that by loving DH and choosing him as my life partner, I have to also accept what comes together as a package. And to acknowledge that without her, there will not be him. Of course, bearing in mind, he can afford to give me up anytime in favour of his first love. And I cannot afford this. My life is already too much intertwined and revolves around him to be separated from him.
Hmm, maybe I should start reading the Book of Ruth for more inspiration and motivation to overcome this part of my life.
Last Friday, I have a house guest who is supposed to stay at our home for a month. I was already having nightmare even before she bought her air ticket. A check in the internet asked me to treat her like how I treat other house guest, but how do I do it when she is unpredictable? Upon arrival, her announcement of her intention to stay for a year almost gave me a heart attack!
Being a bad host, I was already feeling apprehensive after one night having her in our house. She is staying in the room where DH put his clothes. After one night, she took all of DH's empty clothes hangers and claimed them as her own. Who is to be blamed except for myself who fell behind in my ironing. She also took all my photo frames and dumped them out of the room and removing my plant, replacing it with her own things. So I took my stand the next morning by moving the plant back to its original place and put my photos in the store room.
As my guest tried to make herself comfortable and claimed the house as her own, I tried not to voice my discomfort to DH. Especially when this week is his busy week and most of all, she is his first love. Like it or not, one thing both of us have in common is we love him and he loves us. And the similarity ends there. Maybe the conflict or rather discomfort between myself and my house guest stem from our common trait.
Unfortunately all my restraint came to a halt when I told her to go stay at her daughter's house. She thought I tried to chase her away, of course I am, but I did not lie when I told her that her daughter invited her to stay. I do not know why she preferred to stay with us than her daughter even though our relationship is nothing to talk about. Anyway she told DH about it, hoping to expose my lie. I am blessed that her daughter called today to extend her invitation again. However, she agreed to stay there only for a few days, as she wants to come back and reclaim my home, haha.
I am ashamed to say that I failed not to involve DH in my vendetta. When his first love put her things into my needlework box, I immediately told her not to put her things in my house as I do not have enough storage space and I need to move around frequently. As I am always the only one who are packing our things, I could not afford to let her keep her things at my home. Furthermore, her daughter has bought a house and reserve a room for her. THAT should be her house.
On top of that I asked her to keep the scissors that she took from my kitchen. It being a kitchen scissors are rendered unsuitable to be used in the kitchen again after she took it to cut her things which are not of food items. I told her I would just buy a new scissors for my kitchen.
Maybe the communications that I had with her offended her that she decided not to come home the next day until DH is home. I do not know if she did it on purpose to spite me but she claimed that she forgot to bring the door access card and her mobile phone. As DH needed to work till midnight, she stayed out till he was home. It made me so worried that I have no other choice but to send a message to DH at his office and tell him about our fallout.
When DH brought her home at midnight, I just stayed in the room for not wanting to see her. At the same time, I was really, really ashamed to face DH for putting him in a difficult position again, even though she will only be visiting for a month. There and then, I decided not to communicate with her again. I think non-communication is better than miscommunication.
Now that she has gone to her daughter's house for a few days, I have time to think through what has been going on for the past few days. Maybe it is just me and my personality that is preventing me from having a good relationship with her. As of today, I am a very happy and contented person, except for this area of my life.
Guess I have to psycho myself to accept my fate and accept her into my life, as tough as it is. I should accept the fact that by loving DH and choosing him as my life partner, I have to also accept what comes together as a package. And to acknowledge that without her, there will not be him. Of course, bearing in mind, he can afford to give me up anytime in favour of his first love. And I cannot afford this. My life is already too much intertwined and revolves around him to be separated from him.
Hmm, maybe I should start reading the Book of Ruth for more inspiration and motivation to overcome this part of my life.
Saturday, September 4, 2010
Yoga Mama
I bought the yoga CD months ago, during my early pregnancy. It has been sitting on the shelf, untouched, unopened, still wrapped in its plastics. At long last, on the first day of my third trimester, I tried to follow the yoga moves on the CD.
Surprisingly the moves on the yoga CD were quite easy to follow, even for someone who is heavily pregnant. I did not feel tired after the exercise, but at night, for two consecutive nights, I was sleeping like a pig. The word insomnia did not even exist in my dictionary.
Since I am grossly overweight, I am hoping that the yoga exercise together with my morning walks and stairs climbing will help me to control my weight gain for the last three months of my pregnancy. On top of that, I have altered my diet to eat less carbohydrate. And eating cereal in the morning make me full till late afternoon where my lunch and tea break is taken together as a meal instead of two.
Since I would be surpassing my target weight gain of 10kg, I am praying that I will not surpass the 15kg mark. The last two pregnancy weight gains were 11kg and 13kg respectively. Maybe, just maybe my body is gearing up to feed a lot of breast milk this time round.
For as long as possible....
Surprisingly the moves on the yoga CD were quite easy to follow, even for someone who is heavily pregnant. I did not feel tired after the exercise, but at night, for two consecutive nights, I was sleeping like a pig. The word insomnia did not even exist in my dictionary.
Since I am grossly overweight, I am hoping that the yoga exercise together with my morning walks and stairs climbing will help me to control my weight gain for the last three months of my pregnancy. On top of that, I have altered my diet to eat less carbohydrate. And eating cereal in the morning make me full till late afternoon where my lunch and tea break is taken together as a meal instead of two.
Since I would be surpassing my target weight gain of 10kg, I am praying that I will not surpass the 15kg mark. The last two pregnancy weight gains were 11kg and 13kg respectively. Maybe, just maybe my body is gearing up to feed a lot of breast milk this time round.
For as long as possible....
Thursday, September 2, 2010
Happy Baby, Fatty Mommy
Today, I am officially 28 weeks pregnant and going towards my final trimester of the pregnancy.
According to baby center, the average weight gain at this moment is 5kg and for the first time in my life, I am way above average. I have gained a total of 8.5kg! What do I do? How do I control my weight gain for the next three months? I don't know! As far as I know I have done all I can to control the weight gain but it seems such a huge incontrollable monster.
As mommy is gaining weight, so is baby starting to build fat around her body, gearing up to be ready to be born by end of November. She can open her eyes now and follow the light if we shine a torchlight at mommy's stomach. That is according to the baby center website, at least. We have not tried that though.
What we did try was daddy trying to tap mommy's tummy when dear baby was kicking around. To our surprise, she responded to daddy's tap by tapping from the inside of mommy's tummy. And so the tap dance between daddy and baby started, through mommy's tummy. In the middle of the night! Till mommy said enough is enough and mommy needed to sleep.
As we have two boys, we are faced with a new challenge of raising a baby girl. We bought a book specifically to guide us on what a baby girl is like. It is truly that a baby girl is different from a baby boy from the moment she is conceived. Looks like we need to get more books on baby girl to empower us to educate and raise her well.
And mommy needs to learn to be more gentle....
According to baby center, the average weight gain at this moment is 5kg and for the first time in my life, I am way above average. I have gained a total of 8.5kg! What do I do? How do I control my weight gain for the next three months? I don't know! As far as I know I have done all I can to control the weight gain but it seems such a huge incontrollable monster.
As mommy is gaining weight, so is baby starting to build fat around her body, gearing up to be ready to be born by end of November. She can open her eyes now and follow the light if we shine a torchlight at mommy's stomach. That is according to the baby center website, at least. We have not tried that though.
What we did try was daddy trying to tap mommy's tummy when dear baby was kicking around. To our surprise, she responded to daddy's tap by tapping from the inside of mommy's tummy. And so the tap dance between daddy and baby started, through mommy's tummy. In the middle of the night! Till mommy said enough is enough and mommy needed to sleep.
As we have two boys, we are faced with a new challenge of raising a baby girl. We bought a book specifically to guide us on what a baby girl is like. It is truly that a baby girl is different from a baby boy from the moment she is conceived. Looks like we need to get more books on baby girl to empower us to educate and raise her well.
And mommy needs to learn to be more gentle....
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